The Big Sick Review

I know I'm in the minority. The Big Sick has almost universal praise and I'm the fly in the ointment. But if you ask my family, that's the role I was born to play.

Baby Driver Review

Baby Driver is stupid. This wonderful statement of opinion comes to you from a guy who sat behind me during my screening of The Fate of the Furious.

Transformers: The Last Knight Review

There are countless aspects to rail on about. But focusing on negatives will never make the world better. Instead, I want to focus on the positives. Here is everything positive about Transformers: The Last Knight.

Rough Night Review

Twists are telegraphed from miles away. Foreshadowing has the subtly of a drag queen's eye shadow. But I still laughed, a lot.


General Porpoise Doughnuts Review

General Porpoise Doughnuts in Seattle, WA sells perfect doughnuts. Just be sure to open a few credit cards before coming to visit.


The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild Review

I have no memory of time before the darkness. The moment my eyes opened to the darkened chamber was my oldest memory. I hadn’t any idea as to my location, identity or purpose. Curious, I found my way through the darkness and discovered white...


Alien: Covenant Review

No man can serve two masters. For either he will hate the one and love the other; or else he will hold to the one and despise the other. Ye cannot serve Prometheus and Aliens.


Quarry Hymns

How deep is this hole I feel I'm in? Seen a lot of lights and done a lot with them.


Trial & Error Season 1 Review

Trial & Error is a real television show? It's likely that Trial & Error is just an elaborate prank someone is trying to pull on me... or I've had a stroke.


Hold On… I Gotta Instagram This Real Quick

This is my friend. We are standing on the banks of the Hood River in Oregon. This is a convergence point where to branches of the river reconnect. If I turned my camera to the left you’d see a series of waterfalls. Needless to say it is a...