89th Academy Awards Predictions

It's that special time of year when all the armchair movie critics like myself huddle around the television with their thumbs ready to pounce on Twitter. I hold my breath as each new presenter struts onto the...

Sing Review

Sing is a thoroughly average story serving as a thin excuse to have entertaining musical numbers. And animals are involved for some reason.

Chiron with bloody face

Moonlight Review

I could give Moonlight five stars and nobody would be the wiser. But it'd be a lie. Moonlight has an incredible story to tell but doesn't tell it incredibly well.


General Porpoise Doughnuts Review

General Porpoise Doughnuts in Seattle, WA sells perfect doughnuts. Just be sure to open a few credit cards before coming to visit.

Burger King Mac n’ Cheetos Review

The worst part about Burger King’s new Mac n’ Cheetos is ordering them. I needed time and strength to accept my future actions. It took all the courage I had to look another human in the eye and admit that, yes, I want to consume deep...


ABZU Review

Some talented game developers were sitting around, trying to come up with a new game and thought, "Hey! What if we made Journey... but underwater!" The developers squeeled with delight and ABZU was born.

Ratchet & Clank Review

There was a moment while playing Ratchet & Clank when I realized that it was one of the most enjoyable video games I've ever played.

Star Realms Title Screen

Star Realms Review

If I learned only one thing from my time playing Star Realms it was this: the Universe is a cold, unforgiving plain of existence where every fiber of matter is against you. Give up all hope. Nothing can save you for there is nothing at all.


La La Land Review

I nominate La La Land for the Academy Award for "Most Depressing Movie." Don't be fooled by its whimsy.

Hell or High Water Review

Hell or High Water is a classic western told in modern times. Replace the Broncos™ with broncos, the Rams™ with rams and you've got a John Wayne classic.


Stranger Things Review

Stranger Things is one of the best movies to come out of the 1980s. Sure, it’s technically a Netflix television series that was released in 2016 but don’t let reality stand in your way.

River Review

Hi. My name’s John River. I’m Swedish. I’m a detective inspector for the Met in London. My job is stressful. I’m worried my partner Stevie is involved in something nefarious. I’m terrified that I don’t know the...

A Very Murray Christmas

A Very Murray Christmas Review

Do you suffer from seasonal affective disorder? I have just the Christmas special for you! With what could be considered some sort of sequel to Lost in Translation, Sofia Coppola and Bill Murray have returned to spread some sort of feeling that...


Hold On… I Gotta Instagram This Real Quick

This is my friend. We are standing on the banks of the Hood River in Oregon. This is a convergence point where to branches of the river reconnect. If I turned my camera to the left you’d see a series of waterfalls. Needless to say it is a...

Order of Nostalgia at the B & B Cafe

What does nostalgia taste like? There are millions of smells and flavors in your life. Which combination sums up all the warm memories? I suppose the easy answer is butter and maple syrup on a pancake.

Two Winter Days in Hood River, Oregon

Hood River, Oregon nestles against the Columbia River Gorge an hour east of Portland and sits almost equidistant from three volcanoes: Mount Hood, Mount Adams and Mount St. Helens. The community has taken the rolling farmland, bustling river winds...

Follow Me